Hello and welcome to Tulsa tumble talk with justice tumbling company, the one and only Tulsa tumbling show where we your Tulsa tumbling experts. Answer the questions that we get from parents and athletes on a daily basis. We are your hosts, Coulton cruise and rusty breath slur and we are the owners of justice tumbling company and Tulsa, Oklahoma. Okay. So today we’re going to be talking about parents too, parents, uh, to athletes about parents. Uh, we’re going to be touching base on a somewhat sensitive subject. Um, but that’s okay. We, we are completely transparent here at justice stumbling company and we are honest and uh, all we want to do is make your athletes the best tumblers that they can be so that they can go anywhere they want to go and tumble, um, as a, as a, as their career through college, high school, all star. Um, and then maybe even become a, a Jenks Tumbling Lessons  coach if that’s what they want to do on the side.

Yes. So we’re going to be going over a parent involvement all around parent involvement when it comes to tumbling and, or cheerleading cause it kind of goes hand in hand. Um, we believe here at justice that you as a parent, you should just be there as a parent, as a loving parent for support, for support. Um, some parents have cheered in the past. Um, we get that a cheerleading has come a long way since we’ve even done it. Um, so it’s come a long way since some of these parents have done it. Uh, so it’s not even the same mindset that it used to be. It’s a whole different sport. Now. There’s a huge mental aspect behind it.

Oh absolutely. And you know, just since we have, um, gotten out of high school and from what cheerleading as we knew it back then, it has, it has evolved into a completely different type of sport, completely different atmosphere. Um, and so when parents start getting involved, um, not only is it hard for a coach, whether it’s your all star coach or your high school coach, but it’s also hard for your athlete. Um, a lot of times, like, like we said earlier, the athlete just needs a little bit of support and understanding and just, um, some positive reinforcement rather than negative reinforcement. We know that you are paying for the sport, we know that you’re paying, um, you know, the privates, the, the classes, the competition fees, we know that you guys are paying for that. Um, but I think it will make it a lot easier on your athlete to gain skills whenever they don’t have to always answer to their parent after they’ve had like a bad dumpling day, which happens. So let’s

go over some aspects where pants being involved in parent involvement can hinder a kid’s performance or hinder a kid’s learning process. Um, the first one I would say is that we’ve had it, we’ve gone over this before where a parent will say, if you don’t get this skill and this amount of time, I’m pulling you out of tumbling or I’m pulling you out of cheer all together. Um, that’s one of the worst things you can do on the kid. You’re printing a lot of extra stress on an athlete, especially if it’s an advanced skill that some kids spend years getting. You’re trying to rush that process. Um, you’re either going to cause the kid to start blocking or you’re going to cause the kid to just say all right and try it and hurt themselves. And we don’t want either one of those.

It’s absolutely the, the problem, um, with a, with that attitude, you bet at you have, you have to throw this or I’m pulling you out. Um, what it does is every time that athlete makes a mistake, they think that they’re taking steps further away from their goal when actually they are taking steps forward towards it because they’re learning from their mistakes. And so to, um, put that limit to the mistakes that they can make a really, really, really puts a lot of stress on the athlete so that every time they make a mistake, they, they, they just hate themselves even more. They are more, they load a Jenks Tumbling Lessons even more with every accident that they make.

So an example, number two, um, as a co a parent who tries to coach, um, and that can be in two senses. So at home that could mean like trying to spot not necessary. Um, if you drop your kid they will lose every bit of trust and there will always be that in their head that their parents dropped them.

And, but then it will also be inherited to whatever coach they work with the next time. Uh, because if they, if they can’t trust their, uh, their parent to spot them, how can they trust a random person, a random adult that, that doesn’t love them the way their parents do it. And by no means is that a challenge for you to try to spot your kid and not drop them. Um, let the coaches spot who have been trained, who have, who have had the experience to make saves whenever things start going downhill and it’s quick and a quick movements.

Yes. And we’ve done podcasts on it before. Um, parents should never be spotting at home. Even if you have cheered in the past or even if you have spotted in the past like it, it’s when it’s your own kid, let the people you are paying them spot and coach your athlete. Um, we get at parents want their kids to be able to work on a lot of the stuff at home. Um, there is other things you can at home. So that’s the spotting portion of parents trying to coach. There are also those parents and privates or classes that will our cross the gym sometimes yell out their kid.

There’s certain things, you know, nobody likes a backseat driver and nobody likes a sideline coach. Um, who’s actually a parent. It, it. Um, we, it’s like we said this is a really touchy subject, but it’s honesty and it’s something that needs to be, it needs to be talked about. Um, so much so that there, there are lots of coaches in other sports that, um, that talk about this. Now this is a video that has been going around on Facebook for awhile. Um, but it is, it’s important to listen to. Uh, and so we want to, we want to put it on here and this video is Frank Martin. He’s the head coach at South Carolina, the men’s basketball head coach. Um, and he is in an interview and talking to reporters and stuff, but he’s talking about parents. So we want you guys to listen to that and uh, and hopefully that can, can, can shed some light on what exactly we’re talking about.

I know this on the most animated coach they use probably ever seen when my change planes,

I go watch my kids play. I don’t shave boo, I don’t wave my arms. I don’t try to coach my kid with all due respect to most parents out there, I probably know more about basketball and most of them, okay. But I should understand, and I don’t show your word. I don’t try to tell my kid how they should play. You know what I told my two boys when they come at me, why are you asking me man, I didn’t run your practice. We’re pumped to your coach. But I don’t talk about your coach in front of me man. Because if you are, then you’re not playing basketball. You don’t understand why you didn’t play better. Roll talk to your coach. I’m not your coach. I’m your dad. Somebody disrespects you then I’m here. If you fail, good deal with it. I’m going to help you get up that. Don’t come talk to me about coaching. There are coach over here under parent over here yelling at them. And we wonder why kids get confused. My wife, kids rebel. Why? Kids don’t know how to listen. How can you listen when you got so many voices in your head at the same time? You know what life teaches you shut things off. And that’s, that’s the part that’s frustrating to me. Image if someone show wants to be so animated

when there’s a basketball game going on and go coach the team.

All right, so that was a coach, Frank Martin from the men’s basketball, men’s basketball, head coach at South Carolina. Uh, we wanted you guys to listen to that, uh, to kind of see what we were talking about. Um, it’s not just cheerleading, it is a, every sport that there is whenever parents get involved, it makes it much harder for your kids to, uh, to get those new skills and, and to focus on what they’re doing when they’re trying so hard to appease you.

Yes. If the parent wants it more for the kid, I mean, the kid can feel that and the kid will, like you said, shutdown, a kid shuts down when they’re like, well, my parent almost once it more than I do, like they have to have that drive by themselves and if they’re not getting that drive, then it’s us, our, our job as coaches to get that drive for them. It’s not your job to try to make them passionate about tumbling. It’s, it’s almost going to, I mean, kids love doing the opposite of what their parents as. If you want them to be passionate about tumbling, they’re almost going to do the complete opposite and almost not want to do tumbling at all. So let us do our jobs. Um, we have your kid’s best interest at heart, I can promise you that. Uh, so letting us do our jobs. That’s why if for some reason we do have seating in the lobby, but there have been plenty of times where whether it’s been a private or a class where a kid will literally, before they start their past, like their eyes will glance over out their pants and that that’s not needed. If that’s already showing me your focus isn’t fully on your pass, you’re more worried about what your parents going to say. Are Your parents thought about your top, you’re tumbling.

So when we first opened our gym, we didn’t want any parents sitting in the, in the gym. We wanted parents to sit in the, uh, the lobby. And we had to change that because our classes were so full that there were too many parents in the lobby at one time. And it was just uncomfortable for everybody. But now that we put chairs in the gym, Parents Walk Right through the lobby and won’t even sit down at, on those couches because they want to be there in the gym. And as a, as a coach, we see it all the time where kids don’t want you there. They, they can learn better. They learn faster without you there with, without worrying about your criticism or knowing what you’re thinking. Like rusty said, we see it where kids before they tumble, they look to see if their parents are looking and then after they make a mistake, the only instead of thing, instead of trying to figure out how to fix that mistake or trying to figure out, um, what they did wrong, they’re attention is immediately, um, over at the parent and worried about what they’re going to, they’re going to hear maybe in the car ride home, um, or maybe you’re one of those parents that just sits in the, in the gym just because you want to sit in the gym for whatever reason.

And you don’t ever criticize your kid or you don’t say anything. Maybe you don’t say anything, but the, your, your athlete is still thinking that they want to make you proud. They want to, they want you to see them succeed. And when they fail or when they make a mistake, it’s so much harder to take whenever you’re right there in the room. Um, just be aware of that. Please, please understand why we’re coming to you guys and talking to you about this because it is, it is a real issue. And yeah,

so if we come in, it’s always an awkward conversation, but we were only having that conversation because we know it. I’ll help your kid if we come and ask, Hey, is there any way you could go sit in a lobby for the rest of the costs for the rest of their private? Um, no, we’re doing it for a reason. We’re not trying to just kick you out. We’re not trying to do anything like that. We’re, uh, we’re noticing it’s affecting your child and we’re trying to just make it the most easy, comfortable learning experience for your time.

That’s why we get skills we get, we are kids at our gym gets new skills because it is stress free because it’s judgment free because they don’t have their all star or their high school coach staring them down, watching them make every mistake. They don’t have their parents there staring them down, watching them make every mistake to, to learn your, they have to fall. They have to make mistakes and then get up and learn from every mistake that they, that they have. So, um, if you’re listening to this, please do not take this the wrong way. It, it’s, it’s meant for nothing but the best outcome for your child. Uh, and uh, so trust us in that trust the process. We love you guys. Um, if you guys do have any concerns, please bring them to us. Let us know. And if you don’t know about us, um, you can check out our website. We’d love it. If you’d check out, check it out. Uh, it’s www.justicetumblingcode.com.

Or you can find us on Facebook and Instagram. And if you have a Google account, we’d love it if you left us and objective Jenks Tumbling Lessons Google review to let us know how we’re doing.

We’ll see you next time on Tulsa temple. Talk with Jenks Tumbling Lessons justice tumbling company.